June 23, 2012

Hidup Dengan Cabaran

Kuala Terengganu

8.28 pm

29 C


Aku di depan notebook. Kembali kepada hidup yang dulu. Hidup orang awam. Tapi kali ni lebih gila. Bergelumang seharian. Nonstop. Hari minggu belajar. Hari kerja kerja. Balik kerja menaip. Ingat adik-adik, jangan buat distance learning. Susah. Aku tak pasti apa yang susah. Mungkin hidup ini memang susah. Nak duit susah. Nak kahwin pun susah. Nak syurga lagi la tak mudah.


Aku rindu dhoti dekat Kakrail. Aku teringat Gozaria. Saat-saat dekat dengan Allah. Aku rindu menangis bersama Maulana Zubair. Selipar hilang berapa kali. Kepenatan dalam train. Penat duduk, tidur, penat tidur, berjalan. 3 hari dekat dalam. Sakit tapi sedap. Aku terkenang masa turun dekat New Delhi Station. Berjalan punya jauh bawa kelambu, beg besar-besar. Lalu deretan mata. Macam-macam orang. Sikh dengan kerisnya. Aku rindu makan aiskrim dengan Shukri, Sdad dengan Hisyam. Masa di Kadapa satu paisa pun tak ada. Spek pecah. Rasa rapat dengan Tuhan. Rasa diuji. Aku rindu perasaan masa di sana. Tiada risau apa-apa.


Kalau masalah banyak ingat hadis Nabi mafhumnya bila Allah sayang satu kaum Allah uji mereka. Kalau mereka redha, mereka dapat redha Allah. Begitu juga sebaliknya. Orang kafir anggap orang banyak masalah ni ada sial atau bad luck tapi bagi kita itu orang yang diuji Allah.

3 .:

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